We’re Back In Square One

Your loved one is sick. You seized talking to your closest company. Everything she said, you don’t care anymore. You’ll be left alone. You don’t recognize these four walls any longer. And suddenly, it doesn’t feel like home anymore.

You did everything you could, but it failed you. Everything around you is falling appart. Every chance of getting there is taken away from you, and there’s nothing you can do. You have only yourself to blame. You don’t believe in bad luck. It’s you, and only you. And suddenly, nothing seems to matter anymore.

Everyone still looked for you, but you are no longer the person you were. You no longer have the ear that would listen. The shoulder to carry other people’s pain. The hand who will be there when needed. You grew egoistical. You suddenly question why they won’t listen like you do. Why they wont help you to carry your burden like you have always do. Why there are no hands to reach out there. You stopped asking another question because it only dried you out. They no longer care about answering you anymore. Nobody will answer to you anymore. And suddenly, you feel like you’re alone.

You can’t talk to everyone. You won’t share it with anyone.

Suddenly, you feel small. Suddenly, you feel insignificant.

If this is low, I feel low. If this is hell, I feel living.

Is there anybody out there who
Is lost and hurt and lonely too
Are they bleeding all your colours into one?
And if you come undone
As if you’ve been run through
Some catapult it fired you
You wonder if your chance will ever come
Or if you’re stuck in square one

(COLDPLAY – Square One)

 

*image of “Wind Princess” by Sarah Eitel