If a child lives with criticism
He learns to condemn
If a child lives with hostility
He learns to fight
If a child lives with ridicule
He learns to be shy
If a child lives with shame
He learns to be guilty
If a child lives with tolerance
He learns to be patient
If a child lives with encouragement
He learns confidence
If a child lives with praise
He learns to appreciate
If a child lives with fairness
He learns justice
If a child lives with security
He learns to have faith
If a child lives with approval
He learns to like himself
If a child lives with acceptance and friendship
He learns to find love in the world.
(Dorothy Law Nolte, “Children Learn What They Live,” in Looking Out/Looking In. Ed. by Ron Adler and Neil Towne (San Fransisco: Holt, 1975), p.43) -dikutip tanpa izin dari penulisnya 😛
It’s probably true. It’s probably not very true. But I can’t say that it’s wrong. How we were brought up deeply affects our personality and the possible outcome as we grow older. I do believe in nurture theory. But somewhere, deep down, we always felt that, somehow, a rather big part of what we found in our personality came from something else.
Changes are possible. But what if, for the scientist in all of us, we are what is written in our DNA code, for example. Or for the superstitious, we are our birth dates, constellation of the stars.
Or the explanation is, what we have in our nurture, showed and highlighted some tendencies that we have and sinked the unexplored?
Are my friends mattered? Are my siblings mattered? Are my parents mattered? Are they taking up a significant part in developing who I am today? Well, they all do. But then, how much?
*4:27AM, iseng menulis sambil menunggu kantuk yang tak kunjung datang menjelang*